Dang it's been forever.

I can't sleep, I've been sick for about 3 weeks, and my medicine keeps me awake.
I might be going to the hospital tomorrow, maybe they'll make me better,
that would be nice.

It's been awhile since I've wrote in this, I really don't check it.
I get your updates emailed to me, so there's no point to come to the page.
I don't really have an update, cause nothing has really changed.

I'm sick and that's about it.
Oh and the fact that I got two of my best friends sick too.
Go me!

Duke beat UNC tonight, thank God.
I was so happy, sorry to the UNC fans.
You played a good game, okay not really.
HANSBOROUGH IS NOT YOUR ONLY PLAYER!

but that's besides the point.

that's all for my update.

well it's been a long week, and the weeks before went by so fast. I get my liscense next monday. My internet is really slow, aol. I'm listening to a song that's really funny, well the song itself isn't funny but the thought that goes with it is.

i ready for school to come and go. September 1st i have oral surgery, and sept 19 i have a physical. ehh. Daniel's b-day is that day [sept 19]. So i'm pretty much cool with Amber now, we talked some today at church.

Today was kevin's last day at church for awhile, cause he moved.

well that's whats been going on. Laterr.

oh how i love quotes, there's alot cause i'm bored.

i want a guy that doesn't care about what i wear or how i do my hair. who loves my smile & my dorky laugh & how i get hyper when i'm tired. who would never want to see me cry; at least not tears of sadness. and who would do those small things that make my day just because he knows it would make me happy. <3

the best kind of friend is the kind you can sit
on the swings with, never saying a word to each
other; and you walk away feeling like it was the
[ best conversation of your life ]

if i had nothing but God ...
i'd still have everything i've
[ ever wanted ]

i want a boy who would hold my hand in line at the mall & make all the girls jealous. i want someone who would sing to me at random moments. someone who is more goofy than romantic. a boy who would throw stuffed animals at me when i'm acting dumb. someone who would bet me kisses that he could beat me at all the old playstaion games & then let me win. a guy who would make fun of me just to hear my laugh. he'd play with my hair all the time & surprise me with 25 cent rings. someone who i could share lollipops with & lay on a blanket with to count the stars. we'd buy tons of disposable cameras to take the silliest pictures of each other & squirt waterguns at each other in the house. but mostly ; some who would be my best friend & would never break my heart. he would just always make me smile.

i'll always be here for you,

till the very end.

wiping all your tears away,

being your best friend.

i'll smile when you smile,

and feel the pain when you do.

and if you cry a single tear,

i promise i'll cry too.

How long will it take
for him to get the hint?
Because she's been dropping hints
like rain pouring from the clouds

don`t kid yourself, that
boy loves you in a way
he`s not ready to deal with

it's now or never cause I can't just be friends baby
knowing in the end I will love you more then that.

Forgettin my past, tellin myself its gonnna be alright .
Movin onto the ( . n e x t . ) chapter in my life

& they say that "the teenage years"
are the most confusing years
of a girls life.
well guess what mom ?
you're not helping me understand.

& if we never talk again
i just want you to know that the
days i spent with you
were the best days of my life..

i love you, i miss you, and i'm getting tired
they say "absence darkens heart and desire"
but we'll show them; take my hand
because we know them
they're skeptics elected
to make hearts reluctant

to me, you're worth the fight,
but i'm not going to fight forever

Oh, you silly boy,
you let the one girl
who actually cared
slip away forever.

at Topsail Island. Word to your mother.

so me and jyda are at Topsail Island for another week. We're staying with Jyda's cousin, and we're leaving soon to pick up the roommate.
Right now, we are...um..grossed out. For 1- just thinking about a guy who is like my brother looking at scat, grosses me out. 2- i didn't believe cody when he said scatlovers.com and i should've. 3- i knew what it was but i preferred not to have seen it.

Anyways;;
Life is not particularly going well for me. Let's just leave it at this...I'm too young for a guy i like, and he kinda likes me back, and it sucks. I'm 16 and he's 22. So it's not really going well for me. But in 2 years, i'll be 18 and living closer to him, so we'll see how it goes. It still upsets me though.

On another note;;
I'm starting a new chapter in my life. I'm done with my past, and the people who hurt me in the past. I'm also changing myself for myself, noone is telling me how to change myself, because i'm doing this for me. Tim told me once, "if you want to change yourself, don't do it because people tell you to, do it because you want to", so i believe i going to start doing that.

that's pretty much it. I'll get home this coming up sunday, and my computer will be at home and fixed, thank god.

<333

so its been awhile because my computer is broken. right now im using my aunts cousins computer.

Um well it looks like im gonna have the worse sweet 16 ever. None of my family is going and 7 friends are coming. I am really upset. I have people i consider friends but i dont know them long enough to invite them to go out to eat. I guess its better for my mom cause shes payen for my friends to eat. Its just really upsetting.

One of my best friends got in a wreck. she said she lost some of her memory. thats great to hear, especially since its long term.

Well, my other best friend diana, shes getting a boyfriend pretty soon, and once again imma be the only friend w.o a boyfriend. I think there's somethen wrong with me. lol. really.

I miss my best twin friend melinda. i haven't talked to her in forever. i have no idea how she is or anything. i hope she reads this. I MISS YOU!!! love you too.

okay well thats enough for now.

my birthday is May 22. happy sweet 16 to me. =/